Jacob S. Paulsen.com

In 2009 I ran a half marathon in Provo, UT. It was a fantastic challenge. In 2010 I competed in a triathlon relay with my family. This year I ran a marathon. I think I might be done with running challenges for a little while. I’m a runner and will always run but I don’t intend to attack any running challenges beyond 26.2 miles so I’m exploring other outlets for my craziness. I might take up mountain climbing!

Getting ready for the marathon was extreme. I was really only able to train because of our current family situation having moved to Colorado ahead of the rest of my family. I had the time to hit the streets each night without taking time away from my precious wife and children. I followed a training program dictated by an app on my phone. I told it the date of the race, my goal time, and which day of the week I wanted to run my “long runs.”

My goal was simple; to beat Oprah. When I heard that Oprah ran a marathon in 4:29 I knew that had to be my standard. I’m not a particular fan of Oprah and the fact that men are generally faster runners than women, really would have made me hang my head knowing that she was faster than me.

The Salt Lake City marathon on April 16th couldn’t have had better weather. There were eight thousand people at the starting line. Most of these runners would only be running a 1/2 marathon but we all started from the same starting line at the same time. It took me 12 minutes to cross the starting line.

What was it like… battle. I felt fine for the first 15 miles or so. From 17 to 20 miles I could feel myself slipping and losing strength and capacity. From 22 to 25 miles I fought for every step. It was a life changing experience to battle against the overwhelming need to walk, stop, or drop. I think the pictures do a good job of showing about how I felt.

I finished in 4:20:52, about 8 minutes faster than Oprah! The feeling of elation at having run every meter and having finished made up for everything that I went through to get ready and to finish. Would I recommend it? Yes, I think anyone could do it who really believes they can do anything… and after you do this, you can do anything. It gave me a lot of perspective during the race when I passed a woman around 10 miles that was wearing a vest with the words “Blind Athlete” on it. She was being guided with a wrist leash by another runner. I also passed a man around 14 miles that only had one leg. His prosthetic leg caused a strange limp but I can tell you that fewer things in life could be more motivating.

What did I learn in 4 1/2 hours of pain? What could you learn? Well that is between the runner and the race.

Jacob S Paulsen

Thank you to my family, including parents, siblings, and my wife who supported me during training and during the race. Its the type of thing that can be impossible to do alone! Also a thank you to Jon Feltwell who often ran with me while training in Colorado.

In case you are curious I was 58th out of 102 people in my age group. 602nd out of the 1197 total people who finished the full marathon.

I have been reflecting about a personal development quote by a Ralph Waldo Emerson who said “That which we persist in doing becomes easier; not that the nature of the object itself has changed, but that our power to do is increased.” As I was out for my run yesterday and remembering this quote I was reminded of a few stories from my life.

When I was a senior in high school I was a year round runner. In the fall I was a member of the cross country team and in the spring I was involved in track. In long distance races athletes have the tendancy to “fall asleep,” and forget to compete. As you approach the middle of the race you tend to get into a groove and only concentrate on finishing. In one such mile race I have a memory that will stay with me forever. I was nearing the end of the 2nd (of four) lap, when my subconcious woke me out of the runners sleep and told me to choose. I was startled. I was surprised to have the mental clarity to realize that in this moment of the race I had to make a choice. The decision was between racing with all that I had or continuing to push forward in my normal racing speed which although painful it never fully pushed me. That day I choose the high road and I ran the fasted mile of my life. Looking back I suspect that the top performers on my team were those who were able to make that decision during the middle of each of their races. We all make the decision before the race but those early commitments are easily forgotten when the going gets tough.

I have a less happy memory when I think of my college education. The first few years of school went fine as I did the bare minimum to get by in the general classes. As I began taking core business classes in my third year much more effort was required to get a passing grade and I was faced with the decision of stepping up my level of commitment or failing. It wasn’t a conscious choice that I made in my mind but by not deciding to do more I in fact decided to fail. After failing a few classes I eventually dropped out of school and haven’t returned. In this instance I choose what was easy and convenient instead of following the advice of mentors and stretching myself to do what I knew I could.

One last story. I was 21 and had signed a contract with a summer sales company to go out of town for the summer and sell satellite tv door to door. A few days after signing the contract I fell in love. The idea of going to Dallas for the summer while my girlfriend (before I left I proposed) was in Wyoming was hard. As the summer approached my designated summer location changed several times and I ended up knocking doors in Billings, MT. In mid June our sales manager told us that we had knocked every door in Billings and that we were going to move to Iowa to finish the summer. I had sold less than 40 units and was only making enough money to break even on my expenses. I couldn’t logically justify driving so far East away from my future bride when frankly the job wasn’t going well. I did it anyway. I needed the growth and to develop the sales skills and something extremely deep inside of me forced me into the car and steered it toward Des Moines.

When the most difficult choices in life come to us, we “will have to choose between that which is easy, and that which is right.” The voice or power deep inside which guides us to take the high road must be developed and strengthened. We exercise it just like any other muscle. In the end it will be the small day to day decisions that we make that will build the strength we need to do the most difficult but necessary of tasks later. Getting up when the alarm goes off, working out when you are too tired, and reading a book to your child when you would rather watch TV are all “tough decision muscle” builders.

Think through your past and search for those difficult decisions that you made correctly and draw on those memories when you need more help. Building discipline in every moment of every day will help you and I reach our divine potential and rise to the occasion when it matters most. Personal Development is a journey after all.

On January 25th I bought a new journal. I have been a relatively consistent record keeper (journal writer) since the age of 15. I use the term record keeper so as to crush the stereotype of journal keeping. Most think of journals as notebooks like the one I bought yesterday in which they write daily or weekly events, feelings, etc. I argue that writing in a notebook is only one form of journal keeping.

My record keeping has taken many shapes. Many of my journals are 3 ring binders in which I include printed emails and articles. I often insert wedding announcements, cards, letters, and newspaper comics. I’m certain that all of my speeding tickets are clipped into my journals. Other records of mine include photo albums of various sorts. Over the years these have turned from physical books with inserted pictures to CDs and DVDs with backups of pictures over the years but they are records none the less. I have often thought of this, my own blog as a form of journal. It was on the day that I decided that I wrote this blog for my own benefit instead of the benefit of others that I began to enjoy the writing. Other forms of journals for me would be the movie reviews I write on my Flixster profile and the Book reviews I keep on my GoodReads profile. A good number of Facebook notes would also qualify. I try to make it a habit of printing and archiving each of those in a three ring binder too. I suppose that any organized collection of personal content could be considered a journal.

Why do we feel the need to keep records about our lives? It seems to be an inherent part of human nature to keep track of things. I suppose that it could be a natural sense of pride that drives us to believe that our lives are of enough importance to warrant recording. Perhaps it is the belief that the mere process of recording our thoughts and actions can be therapeutic. I also believe that there is something inherent in human nature that drives us to know about our own past. As I get older, my thirst for knowledge about my own family’s past, my country’s past, and the ancient past of the world grows. It could perhaps be that thirst that drives me to keep a journal that I might believe deep down could benefit my own posterity.

Whatever the reason is I have found that without a doubt, the times in my life when I’m most productive and most on task with my goals and my inner purpose; are the times when I’m keeping up in my journal keeping.

I wish all of you great journal / record keeping luck and tools that will help you stay on purpose and build a personal legacy for yourself and for your posterity.

In every possible way Albus Dumbledore from the Harry Potter stories, is the epitome of a great leader. There is of course the first are foremost organization of Hogwarts school that he leads forward with great leadership but much more importantly he is the leader of the greater fight against evil. There are a long list of things that make Dumbledore a great leader. Among them are some of the manager qualities of organization, reporting, and communication. However management never was leadership and Corporations who don’t understand that fail. What we are trying to establish here is the fact that Dumbledore was a great leader and establish what key traits made him such.

In trying to establish his leadership I suggest we look at the results that come from Albus Dumbledore’s leadership in the Harry Potter books. People of course love him and trust him, and his enemies fear him. His school runs smoothly despite his occasional absence or eccentric staff appointments and decisions. He also seems to have a habit of creating other effective leaders all around him. It would seem that he is somehow connected to every important and significant witch or wizard in the country. He is even the Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot, member of the International Confederation of Wizards, and founder and leader of The Order of the Phoenix but take note that he turned down the position of Minister of Magic. He works only in roles that give him an advantage in his goals. To further argue that he is a great leader I would point out that even though he does make mistakes (and he admits it), his goals are accomplished in the end. The reign of Voldemort comes to an end and that age of evil falls. Harry lives.

Accepting that he is indeed a great leader let us consider what are his greatest traits at the source of that fine leadership. Some of the more immediate answers might include that he knows his own strengths and utilizes them well. Perhaps the fact that he has an eye for great talent and knows how to effectively deploy people to the greatest advantage of the group and the individuals. He also adapts well to change and tends to foresee what’s coming. While these are all qualities of a great leader, and certainly qualities that Dumbledore possess, they are not the core qualities that define him as a leader.

Consider how his world revolves around two overlying values, trust and love. Dumbledore is a man who cares about the truth and has a strange tendency to trust people. Despite this people trust him so much that as Hermoine points out, “Dumbledore trusts him and if we can’t trust Dumbledore who can we trust?” People trust him for one simple reason. They know he sincerely cares about them. They trust that he has no hidden agenda or secondary motive. This trust comes from his ability to care or to be more frank, love. He loves people and sincerely wants what’s best for them. This isn’t a fake smile and a dance but a true feeling that comes from deep down. Consider anyone who you think of as a great leader and you will agree that you trusted them and you were confident they had your best interests at heart.

Dumbledore is always trying to train more leaders and Harry Potter is our prime candidate. Dumbledore could have spent time teaching Harry Potter a variety of magic or techniques but he knows how to create a great leader. He focuses on principles and key among them are a quest for truth and the power of true love. Remember that as you interact with people around you. Do you truly care about those around you? We are no longer in a society where facades and hidden motives can stay hidden. People can sense sincerity and a lack of it. Follow both Dumbledore and Harry’s example as you strive to become a great leader.

Jacob S Paulsen

One of the biggest steps of personal development is self discovery. Self discovery includes the search for one’s own strengths, weaknesses, inspirations, motivations, and more. The better you understand yourself the greater chance you have at improving the core.

One of the things I have been doing recently to understand myself better is in searching my past to find the source of my own personality and character attributes. This is a long and difficult process.

For example, why do I run? When did I begin running and why did I continue for so long? My general ability and desire to run has to be rooted somewhere. Running around on playgrounds at recess couldn’t be the source since most children at that age did that. If I can discover this little thing about me I will be able to perhaps instill in my own children a habit of exercise.

So here it goes:

My first memory of doing any running outside of what any other kids would have done stems back to elementary school. After grade 3 I stopped packing a lunch every day and started going home for lunch. One of the best things of going home for lunch everyday was the potential for a longer recess. The faster I got home and got back, the more time I got to play before going back in. This was motivation enough for me to run home for lunch and then run back to school. Even at a run it took me 7 or 8 minutes maybe to get home. Come to think of it this would probably explain why I eat so fast too.

Next memory of extra running comes from my paper route: I delivered the Green River Star paper every Tuesday. Mostly I walked the route because of the heavy load of papers on my shoulders but toward the end I would finish at a run to get home faster.

Around 6th or 7th grade I also picked up a daily paper route for the Daily Rocket Miner. My dad would drive me to the delivery area and drop me off at the top of each street. I would take an armful of papers and run the street throwing papers back and forth meeting my Dad at the end of the street where he delivered the last few homes while waiting. This was good for 30 minutes of running 6 days a week for 6 years.

In Junior High I joined the track team and ran distance. Mostly this decision came from the desire to be in a sport but not having skill at anything else. I figured I could do this and there was the least amount of competition at the longer distances so I decided to compete in the mile and 1/2 mile.  This continued through the end of high school where I also was on the cross country team.

Its not just about running. Why are we the way we are. If we wish to improve ourselves we must first understand who we are, thus enabling us to measure improvement. Changes are most easily made when we can identify how habits were formed in the first place.

I was recently interviewed about my experience as an entrepreneur. In the course of the 60 minute interview a very powerful phrase came out of my mouth and I’ve been reflecting on it ever since. I said, “Its not actually about who you know in life, but instead about who you are in life that matters.”

We commonly accept in life that people gain jobs and opportunities based on their personal connections. I think its a reality that can’t be ignored. I think however that the more important question is how those relationships came to be. It isn’t the simple introduction of someone else that gives us a useful “connection.” Your relationship with another is only a valuable asset if they are willing to help you. If anyone is willing to help you and do you a favor we have to assume that you must provide some form of value to them.

Relationships are based on an exchange of value. Sometimes that exchange can be monetary but those types of relationships don’t last. I’m talking about relationships that are built on an exchange of trust and love. These relationships of value give us a greater position in our society because we are an asset to others and they believe in us. So its true that in this life the people you know can make all the difference.

However, the only reason we “know” those people or gain anything from knowing them is because of the relationship we built with them. That is what I mean when I say that its not actually about who you know in life, but instead about who you are in life that matters. Who you are determines the relationships that you have and therefore who you are is the source of who you know.

I had a recent reality check that came from an unlikely source; my cell phone. The Android smartphone platform has a unique feature. As part of the dialer application there is a favorites list. This favorites list is not a user generated speed dial but instead a list of the contacts you actually talk to the most. Yep, its a quick look at reality and my list is a little scary. I’m happy to report that my wife is currently leading the list in the top spot. Sadly however I have two work associates in the top 4 and my parents are at the bottom of the top 20.

If your phone gave you a list of your “legitimate” favorites what would you see? Would you be happy with the way your loved ones line up?

Go Android

Jacob S Paulsen

Andrew James of AndrewJamesinc.com interviewed me today about 10 books that I would recommend that people read in 2010. I selected a top 10 list of personal development books (below). To listen to the audio interview visit Andrew’s blog here.

With the new year come the resolutions. How about deciding to read some good books? I am listing my favorite 10 personal development books. Not listed in any specific order these books will help you grow in various aspects of your life.

1. The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership – John C Maxwell
2. If Harry Potter Ran General Electric – Tom Morris
3. Secrets of the Millionaire Mind – T. Harv Eker
4. Speed of Trust – Stephen M. R. Covey
5. Think and Grow Rich – Napolean Hill
6. The Greatest Salesman in the World – Og Mandino
7. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People – Stephen R. Covey
8. Personal Power II – Anthony Robbins
9. How to Win Friends and Influence People – Dale Carnegie
10. The Power of Full Engagement – Jim Loehr

Of all the things I have learned from the Harry Potter saga, this is the most powerful to me. If you were to ask yourself what was Harry Potter’s greatest strength or asset; what would you say? I would say, “his friends.”

The strength of any person can be measured by those who are loyal to him. This was well illustrated by both Harry Potter and Albus Dumbledore, who had such a large number of loyal followers, we cannot begin to list all of them. I hesitate to use the word followers, lest each of us think we need to gain followers (not referring to twitter friends). What I really mean by followers, is people who would readily come to your aid; people who would willing sacrifice their own needs or possessions to grant yours. In effect, people who love you.

We see this pattern over and over as Harry’s friends including Ron, Hermoine, Neville, Luna, & Ginny willingly put their own needs behind them in an effort to help and assist Harry. This was because of both their love for Harry and for their love of Harry’s cause.

Adults were equally drawn in to him. Dumbledore, Lupin, McGonagall, Hagrid, the Weasleys, and countless others were willing to sacrifice their own lives for him and several did.

Creatures including Dobby, Creature, Buckbeak, and Hedwig were eager to defend him and his interests.

The greatest assets anyone can have in their lives are the relationships they build. If you are a religious person, you understand further that your greatest asset is your greatest relationship; the one with your divine creator.

Cherish the people around you. Give them a reason to believe in you by believing in them. Relationships go both ways. The people who have the greatest influence and power, are those who have learned to love and cherish the greatest number of people.

Jacob S Paulsen

Goals are a big part of any business. Over time we have been taught a lot about setting effective goals including the power of written goals. What a lot of people don’t understand is the importance of an action plan. Without a step by step plan to reach your goal you have nothing more than a wish.

Action Plans generally have 3 parts. Each action plan should reflect your goals, the steps you must take to accomplish them, and what will be required of other third parties to make it happen. Third parties may include a business partner, your spouse, or even your creator. In your MLM business this most often includes your upline leadership or company executives.

Your action plan should be written down and signed by all the parties involved. Display it in a place where you will see it regularily and if possible a location where you are in a position to take the most action such as your desk or office.

I have built a simple MLM action plan that you can download here.

Jacob S Paulsen