Jacob S. Paulsen.com

Of all the things I have learned from the Harry Potter saga, this is the most powerful to me. If you were to ask yourself what was Harry Potter’s greatest strength or asset; what would you say? I would say, “his friends.”

The strength of any person can be measured by those who are loyal to him. This was well illustrated by both Harry Potter and Albus Dumbledore, who had such a large number of loyal followers, we cannot begin to list all of them. I hesitate to use the word followers, lest each of us think we need to gain followers (not referring to twitter friends). What I really mean by followers, is people who would readily come to your aid; people who would willing sacrifice their own needs or possessions to grant yours. In effect, people who love you.

We see this pattern over and over as Harry’s friends including Ron, Hermoine, Neville, Luna, & Ginny willingly put their own needs behind them in an effort to help and assist Harry. This was because of both their love for Harry and for their love of Harry’s cause.

Adults were equally drawn in to him. Dumbledore, Lupin, McGonagall, Hagrid, the Weasleys, and countless others were willing to sacrifice their own lives for him and several did.

Creatures including Dobby, Creature, Buckbeak, and Hedwig were eager to defend him and his interests.

The greatest assets anyone can have in their lives are the relationships they build. If you are a religious person, you understand further that your greatest asset is your greatest relationship; the one with your divine creator.

Cherish the people around you. Give them a reason to believe in you by believing in them. Relationships go both ways. The people who have the greatest influence and power, are those who have learned to love and cherish the greatest number of people.

Jacob S Paulsen

Sometimes the most frustrating thing for an entrepreneur can be stagnant results over a period of hard and consistent work. That is why its important for all people to understand the Plateau Principle and how it works in every aspect of your life.

The principle put simple is, “All growth happens in sudden increases followed by periods of flat and maintained results.” This is true in your spiritual, intelectual, financial, emotional, and interpersonal lives. For whatever reason the world sees fit you also experience grown in sudden explosions that come after a period of hard and consistent growth which until that moment had only yeilded flat results.

If you can learn to accept this principle as a reality then you can learn from it and act in accordance. First, understand that growth will only come if you are consistent in doing what is necessary to achieve it, and only after a period of time with seemingly flat results. Second understand that the greatest moments in your life will be short moments of explosive growth. Learn to recognize these moments and take full advantage of them. Record them, declare them, share them with others, and do everything possible to get maximum growth from these moments.

Warning:: Understanding this principle will mean you have the disciple to work hard and patiently wait the explosive moments. What you need to fear is potential recession. If you are always consistent in your effort you will never have negative growth but if you slip in your daily disciplines you are bound to lose momentum and fall. This is your worst enemy.

Jacob S Paulsen

Action:: If you are frustrated in your relationships with loved ones, your spiritual progression, your business, or any other aspect of your life consider where you are in the Plateau curve. Frustration usually comes after a long period of flat results and sadly if you lose focus or stop the daily activities you will fall backwards in the very moment before your next growth curve is set to take place!

The Need to Know concept is mostly illustrated by Dumbledore in the Harry Potter series. Even when Snape asks him to explain what he is doing in his private lessons with Harry, Dumbledore replies with, “I prefer not to put all my secrets in one basket,…”

Dumbledore was a man of as few words as he could manage. This goes against human nature. Each of us has a natural desire to be part of a conversation and without even consciously thinking about it we naturally desire to turn the topic towards ourselves. Few things are as inherent in mankind as the constant need to talk about oneself. With that having been said Dumbledore’s relationships did not suffer because he was short or cold with people. He found a happy middle.

It is a sign of true control when one learns to master his tongue. I suspect that when Dumbledore was engaged in any conversation his thought process what probably closer to “does this person need to know this….” than to “there isn’t any reason I shouldn’t tell this person this…” What is this minor difference? The difference is between only telling people what is necessary and telling people anything or everything as long as you can’t forsee any future harm in it.

We never know what the future might hold or what things today that may seem insignificant might one day become important. However, we must not take this idea to the other extreme. Its one thing to control the human tendency to talk about oneself at every chance and a much different thing to tell people nothing at all. If we all spoke to each other in short, simple, need to know only statements the world would not be a better place.

Remember that our greatest assets are our relationships and making and maintaining strong relationships means sharing yourself with others, becoming transparent, and even dependent on one another. I’m simply suggesting that we bridle the natural human need to tell people everything we can about everything we feel is important to us. Its only in the happy middle of these two extremes that control and thus power over ourselves and our relationships can be strengthened.

Jacob S. Paulsen

Action: Be more conscious as you converse with others. Look back on your conversations to catch yourself bringing the subjects constantly back to you.

I know this might come as a shock but Nike was not born to give Micheal Jordan something to wear. Nike was born to fit the shoe of running legend Steve Prefontaine. Running sports have never had a large following perhaps because they just aren’t as much fun to watch or because they tend to be individual efforts instead of a team sport. What you need to know is that Steve Prefontaine was to running as Tiger Woods is to golf.  Legendary…

Steve Prefontaine wasn’t only famous because he held the National record in 7 different track events but more so because of the way he raced. He liked to give people something to watch and make a show out of it but what you have to understand the most about Steve is that he was a “front runner.” Front running is a term used to describe the foolish runner who leads the pack in a race. The lead runner takes battles up to 70% higher wind resistance than the runner who runs in his wake. Even olympic team members will take turns leading the pack while their star runner stays behind until the final moments. The thing about Steve isn’t that he ran in the front on ocassion but that he always led every single race from the start to the end.

He did it for one simple reason. He understood what running is really all about more than any other human in history. He understood that the only way to finish as a true winner is to give it everything that you got every single step of the way. He didn’t pace himself and he didn’t believe in strategy… he believed in winning out of pure guts…. and he did it almost every time.

His college track coach Bill Bowerman was the founder of Nike. He was famous for his waffle iron, home-made running shoes that he made for each of his runners. He founded Nike under the ideals that Steve Prefontaine lived. Next time you slip on your Nikes remember Steve Prefontaine and how he raced.

Jacob S. Paulsen

Action: Consider what you can do to step up to the plate. What are you afraid of and what is holding you back? What are the best people in your industry doing that you are afraid of doing?

Action: Watch the movie “Without Limits”

Steve Prefontaine Quotes:

A lot of people run a race to see who is fastest. I run to see who has the most guts, who can punish himself into exhausting pace, and then at the end, punish himself even more. – Steve Prefontaine

I run to see who has the most guts. – Steve Prefontaine

I’m going to work so that it’s a pure guts race at the end, and if it is, I am the only one who can win it. – Steve Prefontaine

Somebody may beat me, but they are going to have to bleed to do it. – Steve Prefontaine

Something inside of me just said ‘Hey, wait a minute, I want to beat him,’ and I just took off. – Steve Prefontaine

To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift. – Steve Prefontaine

What I want is to be number one. – Steve Prefontaine

You have to wonder at times what you’re doing out there. Over the years, I’ve given myself a thousand reasons to keep running, but it always comes back to where it started. It comes down to self-satisfaction and a sense of achievement. – Steve Prefontaine

For the first time I’m writing about what we can learn from Harry’s mistakes and not his example. Please understand that I think the Harry Potter character is human and of course is bound to make mistakes if the novel is to be good.

Harry Potter complains about his aunt and uncle and their lame Christmas gifts each year but did he ever send them anything? Harry hates Malfoy and for good reason but does he ever do anything at all to even try to help or mend the relationship?

Harry Potter is young and perhaps we should only expect so much from him, but we can learn from this bad example. A little compassion and understanding can go a long way. When it all comes down to it I dare say that in the 7 books we read Harry never gives his family a reason to love him. Even when people treat us with complete disregard and contempt we must learn to take the higher road and show kindness and respect to everyone. The attitude that we learn to adopt in our lives always comes back to us even if it takes time.

Action steps: Think of the people with whom you have a rough relationship and sort out a way to mend it. Often times transparent communication is a good place to start.

Play to your strengths. It was Mad-Eye Moody who gave Harry Potter this advice when he encouraged him to think of his own strengths that would help him beat his dragon in the upcoming task. In the last 5 years it has been a consistent theme among personal development coaches to teach the focus on one’s strengths instead of the constant focus on improving one’s weaknesses. Nobody did this better than Harry Potter. He learned quickly what he was poorest at, and he surrounded himself with people who could compliment his weaknesses.

What he didn’t do is worry about what he was bad at, and spend all his time trying to improve. Did he study extra hard at Potions or Defense Against the Dark Arts? We need to take his example to heart. We must discover our greatest strengths and structure a life around them. Find a career that will play to your best atributes and surround yourself (especially a spouse) with people who can compensate for your greatest weaknesses.

The second half of this lesson to search out solutions to problems by focusing on your strengths. When trials stand in your way consider what you have to offer to the problem. What talent, resource, or trait are present in you that will allow you to overcome with the greatest speed and efficiency. It does little good to focus thoughts and time outside of your circle of influence. Consider that life never throws anything at you that you can’t overcome even if sometimes it will require the help of your truly greatest resource; your friends.

Deepak Chopra Salt Lake City 2009

This year I haven’t had the opportunity to attend as many events or seminars that I would like but I have heard from Deepak Chopra, Tony Robbins, Connie Podesta, and Ed Viesturs.

I used to think that these expensive seminars and events were a waste of money. Why not just buy the book and listen to it in the car or during my workout? Well, last week while hearing from Connie Podesta I finally understood the difference.

I think it starts with credibility. When you see someone face to face your body, mind, and soul are able to feel that person. You create a relationship of trust between the two of you even if you are only one person in a crowd of 5000. This relationship or buy-in as I call it changes things.

It changes the way you listen for a start. Without any distractions you are able to tune in directly. Because you begin to trust them you internalize the information without hesitation. It will also change the way you read their material later when you are not at the event. Because you have formed that pact of trust you will read more intently and be more likely to learn.

Ed Viesturs at AgelWorld '09 Convention

There is also the simple and obvious fact that you are able to absorb much more information when you are able to use all your senses within seminars. You have heard that different people learn differently. Such as visually, by listening, reading, and by writing. At the event you can use them all if you take some notes.

There is also a social affirmation at events where you are able to retain more information and believe more in what you hear because you have friends and collegues around you.

Looking back now into the last 5 years of my life I now understand why I have enjoyed some authors more than others. It is the ones whom I have seen in person and without realizing it I have taken more from their material. I have purchased books that I otherwise wouldn’t have bothered with.

Don’t be afraid of the events and seminars. They won’t all be amazing but more often than not you will form that relationship of trust that will benefit you for the rest of your life as you recall the information and read the books!

Our own belief system controls our reality.

In the Harry Potter book “The Half Blood Prince,” Ron believes that he has been given , the lucky potion. Because his own belief system is changed, his reality also changes. He performs as if he had been lucky. Clearly this effect would only work if Ron already had the skills necessary to perform. The important point is how our own beliefs change our reality.

Each of us live in a reality that is generated based on what we see and not what is actually there. This is a huge problem in relationships and discussions since none of us can understand the world as seen through anyone else’s perspective. This is a huge bonus however because it also means that you have the power within you to change the world by simply altering your own beliefs. This is done by filling your mind with positive thinking, good education, and hard work. By sharpening our skills and increasing our mental capacity we become capable of changing our own world around us.

In the same book when Harry Potter finally understands that he must kill Voldermort because of who he is and what he did to his family instead of the prophecy it changes everything. The end result is the same but his world changes because of the reason. In his words “It was, he thought, the difference between being dragged into the arena to face a battle to death and walking into the arena with your head held high.”  Dumbledore worked hard to explain to him the importance of this single thing because changing Harry Potter’s belief would alter his own reality and make him all the more likely to succeed in his task.

What does this mean for you? It means that you have control over your world. All the complaining about your job, life, family, or circumstance is your own fault. Not just because you are a whiner (although true) but more importantly because the things you whine about are shaped in your own reality because of your own belief system over which you have COMPLETE CONTROL.

It also means that the way to change your own world is to change your beliefs. This means learning, finding purpose, and understanding your own values. To live by your own values and be conscious of the act will cause in effect a peaceful and happy reality! You are the author of your reality and you hold the power to change it.

Back in March of this year I publicly declared my goal to run in a 1/2 marathon at the end of the summer. I registered for a race on August 8th and have been training all summer. I had some good stretches of training and some times where I was less faithful.

Every single time I went for a training run I recorded the data on www.buddyrunner.com/jacob and also updated my status on twitter and facebook to keep myself accountable to my online community.

Yesterday was the day of the race and I’m pleased to report that I survived! This is without any question the longest distance I have ever run at 13.1 miles. I am sore everywhere and even a day later my legs still feel like jelly.

We had to meet at the finish line at 4:45am to be shuttled in school buses into Provo canyon up South Fork Road. Being on the first bus up I had to wait in the cold and dark for two hours until the race started at 7am. The whole course was beautiful and peaceful as we would through Provo canyon along the river.

I estimate that there were over 3000 runners and this was a different type of runner than I’m used to seeing in my 5K and even 10K races in the past. These were serious runners. No baggy basketball shorts, a lot of heart monitors, and GPS tracking watches.

My wonderful wife Ami, son Simon, and parents were at the finish line along with my sister Shannon and her family. It was really great to have so much support. They had watermelon, pancakes, and granola bars for the runners at the finish line, but my dad brought me a couple of snickers bars (that or he happen to have a couple on it at the time) and a good thing too because I was weak and famished.

I finished in 1 hour 52 minutes and 33 seconds which is about 25 minutes faster than I had hoped for. This put me in 502nd place overall and 32nd in my age group 25-30.

All around a very satisfying experience!

Every year I listen to the Harry Potter books. Something about the epic story really captivates me. As I am moving through the books right now I intend to post a series of posts on personal development lessons we can learn from Harry Potter and his stories. Here is the first installment.

Lesson 1: “Well, well . . . I’m impressed. That suggests what you fear most of all is — fear. Very wise, Harry.” -Professor Lupin

The above quote comes from book 3 in the series and has had me thinking all day. Most people set there fears on specific things such as spiders, heights, water, death, and even commitment.

Harry Potter, as is suggested, fears most of all fear itself. Someone who fears fear is most likely to confront and overcome anything they suspect might scare them. Is this wise?

I am suggesting that our friend Professor Lupin from the story was right, and that this practice/attitude is wise. Why? What is to be gained by confronting and overcoming things that scare you? There are a few simple and logical answers.

1. Overcoming fears will mean that you are scared of less things. This can only be a good thing.

2. The process of confronting fear will only strengthen your character, giving you more power to deal with the conflicts that life gives us.

3. Fearing fear itself gives you a strong understanding of reality and thus gives you more freedom in life to take action and pursue happiness.

People who struggle with fears but are too weak to confront them, face two very large problems. First is that they are bound to live life in constant fear. Second being that their ability to deal with conflicts is generally weakened as they continue to “run” away from the things they fear.

It certainly works for Harry in the story. Although Harry sometimes plunges into dangerous situations unwisely, it is foolishness and not a lack for fear than often puts him in danger. His ability to confront fear instead of dread it however proves to be a helpful trait. It allows him to think logically when under stress, and to do what is frankly necessary regardless what the consequences might be. Harry Potter fans will mistakenly notice this reoccurring pattern throughout the literary saga.

I suggest we all follow Harry’s example and confront our fears head on. By fighting them we increase our own ability to live life to its fullest and function within a true reality of our environment.

Overcoming fear does not mean we need to put ourselves in danger to prove we can handle it. If you are scared of lightning it may not be necessary to stand on top of a hill in a puddle of water during a thunderstorm. It does mean you need to learn the true reality of how lightning works and live in caution but not fear.

I leave you with this final thought; Fear Not. Fear is a tool used to keep you at bay, controllable, and weak. Confront it and overcome its power over you. This will make you both free and strong!

Ask yourself this question… what would your bugart transform into?

Jacob S Paulsen