Jacob S. Paulsen.com

I have been reflecting about a personal development quote by a Ralph Waldo Emerson who said “That which we persist in doing becomes easier; not that the nature of the object itself has changed, but that our power to do is increased.” As I was out for my run yesterday and remembering this quote I was reminded of a few stories from my life.

When I was a senior in high school I was a year round runner. In the fall I was a member of the cross country team and in the spring I was involved in track. In long distance races athletes have the tendancy to “fall asleep,” and forget to compete. As you approach the middle of the race you tend to get into a groove and only concentrate on finishing. In one such mile race I have a memory that will stay with me forever. I was nearing the end of the 2nd (of four) lap, when my subconcious woke me out of the runners sleep and told me to choose. I was startled. I was surprised to have the mental clarity to realize that in this moment of the race I had to make a choice. The decision was between racing with all that I had or continuing to push forward in my normal racing speed which although painful it never fully pushed me. That day I choose the high road and I ran the fasted mile of my life. Looking back I suspect that the top performers on my team were those who were able to make that decision during the middle of each of their races. We all make the decision before the race but those early commitments are easily forgotten when the going gets tough.

I have a less happy memory when I think of my college education. The first few years of school went fine as I did the bare minimum to get by in the general classes. As I began taking core business classes in my third year much more effort was required to get a passing grade and I was faced with the decision of stepping up my level of commitment or failing. It wasn’t a conscious choice that I made in my mind but by not deciding to do more I in fact decided to fail. After failing a few classes I eventually dropped out of school and haven’t returned. In this instance I choose what was easy and convenient instead of following the advice of mentors and stretching myself to do what I knew I could.

One last story. I was 21 and had signed a contract with a summer sales company to go out of town for the summer and sell satellite tv door to door. A few days after signing the contract I fell in love. The idea of going to Dallas for the summer while my girlfriend (before I left I proposed) was in Wyoming was hard. As the summer approached my designated summer location changed several times and I ended up knocking doors in Billings, MT. In mid June our sales manager told us that we had knocked every door in Billings and that we were going to move to Iowa to finish the summer. I had sold less than 40 units and was only making enough money to break even on my expenses. I couldn’t logically justify driving so far East away from my future bride when frankly the job wasn’t going well. I did it anyway. I needed the growth and to develop the sales skills and something extremely deep inside of me forced me into the car and steered it toward Des Moines.

When the most difficult choices in life come to us, we “will have to choose between that which is easy, and that which is right.” The voice or power deep inside which guides us to take the high road must be developed and strengthened. We exercise it just like any other muscle. In the end it will be the small day to day decisions that we make that will build the strength we need to do the most difficult but necessary of tasks later. Getting up when the alarm goes off, working out when you are too tired, and reading a book to your child when you would rather watch TV are all “tough decision muscle” builders.

Think through your past and search for those difficult decisions that you made correctly and draw on those memories when you need more help. Building discipline in every moment of every day will help you and I reach our divine potential and rise to the occasion when it matters most. Personal Development is a journey after all.

On January 25th I bought a new journal. I have been a relatively consistent record keeper (journal writer) since the age of 15. I use the term record keeper so as to crush the stereotype of journal keeping. Most think of journals as notebooks like the one I bought yesterday in which they write daily or weekly events, feelings, etc. I argue that writing in a notebook is only one form of journal keeping.

My record keeping has taken many shapes. Many of my journals are 3 ring binders in which I include printed emails and articles. I often insert wedding announcements, cards, letters, and newspaper comics. I’m certain that all of my speeding tickets are clipped into my journals. Other records of mine include photo albums of various sorts. Over the years these have turned from physical books with inserted pictures to CDs and DVDs with backups of pictures over the years but they are records none the less. I have often thought of this, my own blog as a form of journal. It was on the day that I decided that I wrote this blog for my own benefit instead of the benefit of others that I began to enjoy the writing. Other forms of journals for me would be the movie reviews I write on my Flixster profile and the Book reviews I keep on my GoodReads profile. A good number of Facebook notes would also qualify. I try to make it a habit of printing and archiving each of those in a three ring binder too. I suppose that any organized collection of personal content could be considered a journal.

Why do we feel the need to keep records about our lives? It seems to be an inherent part of human nature to keep track of things. I suppose that it could be a natural sense of pride that drives us to believe that our lives are of enough importance to warrant recording. Perhaps it is the belief that the mere process of recording our thoughts and actions can be therapeutic. I also believe that there is something inherent in human nature that drives us to know about our own past. As I get older, my thirst for knowledge about my own family’s past, my country’s past, and the ancient past of the world grows. It could perhaps be that thirst that drives me to keep a journal that I might believe deep down could benefit my own posterity.

Whatever the reason is I have found that without a doubt, the times in my life when I’m most productive and most on task with my goals and my inner purpose; are the times when I’m keeping up in my journal keeping.

I wish all of you great journal / record keeping luck and tools that will help you stay on purpose and build a personal legacy for yourself and for your posterity.

It was 2002. I was living in Springville UT enjoying my independent life as a cell phone salesman. A childhood friend and coworker, Josh Parker lived exactly 14 miles away in Orem UT. I don’t remember whose idea it was, but we both latched onto it immediately. We should run from his house to mine. We weren’t in shape. In fact we didn’t work out at all. Our days consisted of sitting in cubicles cold calling potential customers or eating Panda Express while sitting in mall kiosks. At the time the idea was born we didn’t even have an idea how far the run would be.

I’m not sure what it is about human nature that makes us want to do things like this. I suspect that it is more present in males than females, but either way I know it exists in me. The need to do things just to say I’ve done them. The deep down desire to achieve is inherent. In the Portuguese language I would use the verb “conseguir.” Conseguir implies more than just achieving a goal. It means to reach out and get it. It implies action and in my mind when I think of the word I see myself reaching out to grab something that seems at first to be out of reach, but with all my effort I’m able to finally grab a hold of it.

We selected a date for the quest. Plans were laid to run in the evening when the heat of summer wouldn’t be as strong. I seem to remember that we started out around 7pm. We had some co-workers who pledged to cheer us on during the trek. It seems funny to me that we didn’t think or choose to do any physical preparation. Looking back I’m not really sure what we did that day. I know that for dinner we decided to go healthy… Subway. Right before the designated hour we had a power juice from the popular Jamba Juice in Orem.

I don’t mean to imply that Josh or I weren’t athletic. I was a diehard runner in high school and Josh was a proven athlete as well. We were out of shape but we weren’t ignorant to what we had committed ourselves to. I don’t think we attached any real sentiment or emotion to the run. It was just something to be done and we wanted to say we had done it.

We started in front of Josh’s Grandma’s home where he was living. It was located at appx 200 north 350 west. We ran down her street until we intersected with 400 west, and turned left to get to Orem Center St. The beginning is the part I remember the least. I remember all the cars driving by. I remember that we had camelbaks full of cold water. It was probably easy going for those first few miles. Our pace wasn’t fast. We weren’t in any hurry to get there and we probably knew we should pace ourselves and conserve energy. I imagine that we chatted. I bet that we talked about all paintball among other things as we turned right on Orem State St and headed south.

If you know the route you know that we got lucky as the first wall hit. Turning left on University Parkway we had gone about 2.75 miles and were starting to feel the pain. Luckily that is where the big down hill comes. It was right along here that I remember our first visit. A coworker (or two) stopped by in the car. They probably shouted some encouraging words and handed us some water. Things were good!

Anytime you decide to do something completely wild like this, despite your reasons, you generally hit this same point in your quest that Josh and I were about to hit. The moment when you realize you are in big trouble. Only the truly weak cut out in this moment. You aren’t finished yet and you know that you can go further but it’s a moment of harsh reality when the worst of negative ideas first begin to tell you it might now work out. You might not finish.

As we got to the bottom of the hill and continued east we finally turned right at University Avenue. Kitty corner from the BYU football stadium I’m confident that traffic was still blazing and that nobody was overly surprised to see a couple of late night joggers. My legs were started to get heavy. We weren’t discussing the pain yet but we both had slowed our pace and without any spoken words we knew what was going on.

University Avenue took us about 16 blocks south. As we turned East again onto 300 south in Provo I think we had another drive by. Our friends were honking and shouting from a window as they passed us by. I vaguely remember our conversations getting more fragmented. Words were exchanged in parts instead of in constant. The truth was that while we were getting an aerobic workout, the real danger and pain was in the legs. When we turned from 300 South onto Provo State St, we had been over 7 miles. Even in the height of my cross country season in High School we rarely went any farther than 8-10 miles.

Provo State St never ended. It was the longest road of my life. Our legs just got heavier and heavier. We encountered what I swear were dozens of uphill climbs that we didn’t remember ever being there when we drove the same route. I don’t remember the downhill stretches, but I’ll never forget the way I felt as we jogged up those hills at a pace slower than a walk. It was on one of these hills that I clearly remember our last friendly visit. I think it was around 10:30pm. We had been out of water for a long time and our friends didn’t have anything to offer us. They took our camel back and promised to return with fresh supply. The reason I remember it so well is because they never returned.

This is the second wall that we all run into on a journey like this one. This is the part where the majority of your conscious thoughts tell you it’s over. Your mind tells you that you were finished awhile ago. You realize that going forward is just foolish and potentially dangerous. What is it within us that keeps us going? Where within the human spirit is that thing, not even a voice or a thought, that keeps you moving when everything else tells you to stop and go back? It’s the part of us that makes heroes. I’m not suggesting that what we were doing was heroic, but it’s that part of human nature that allows us to go against instinct that makes us special.

The last 7 miles of the journey into Springville were horrific. I wish I could say that we ran the whole way. The truth is that it would have been impossible. We were walking more than running the last 5 miles and only able to do that because of frequent stops to stretch. Our muscles were cramping up and it was all we could do to convince our bodies to hang on with us. I remember one such stop in front of the Allen’s Grocery store at the corner of 400 South and Main St in Springville in which we were stretching. It was early in the morning, maybe 1:15am. We were close enough to the end at this point that the thoughts and feelings of “you are going to make it” started to come into play. We were almost home free.

The end of any quest that stretches you so much feels this way. We were just two young men who finished something. I don’t think we talked much about it in the future months. Since there have been some references to it as we guessed at the distance. Remembering that experience teaches me two very important lessons. The difficulty of anything comes from the way you choose to do it. I know that some things are just easy by nature but other tasks can be easy or difficult depending on the path we decide to walk. One of the most crucial lessons of my past is simply that I am capable of much more than I know I am. Physically, mentally, and spiritually I can conquer all. The second nature is this. Doing something just to say you did it isn’t necessarily foolish (although often it can be). As we stretch our own limits of what we believe is normal or possible we build within us greater inner strength and ability to accomplish great things.

Thank you Josh for the many lessons like that one that we were able to learn together.

Jacob S Paulsen

On November 25, 2009 John Jones went with family and friends to explore Nutty Putty Cave in Utah. John slipped and became trapped upside down in a tight crevice. Rescue teams tried all they could to rescue John, but after 28 hours, John passed away. He left behind his wife Emily of just 3 1/2 years; a 13 month old daughter; and an unborn son.

Emily’s brother, Dan Petersen, immediately worried about his sister and how he could help her. He organized the Nutty Putty Cycling Team, originally planning to raise money and support for his sister. Emily felt she’d been so blessed by family and friends, she asked the cyclers to raise money for those who are less fortunate. The trip quickly became a nationwide fundraiser for widows and widowers.

On October 4, 2010, the Nutty Putty Cyclers set forth on a charity bike trek, traveling from Virginia to California, to raise money for the Liz Logelin Foundation, a nonprofit organization dedicated to supporting widows and widowers across the US.

Dan Petersen of Salem, VA, Jonathan Miller of Crestwood, KY, Eric Maughan of Salem VA, and Oliver Thompson of Salem, VAplan to complete their journey December 10, 2010 in San Diego, CA. The four cyclists carry sleeping accommodations and food, but are extremely grateful to those who have offered them last minute room and board. “We’ve surprisingly needed very little because people are so nice and offer us a place to stay,” said Miller.

Donations can be made to the Liz Logelin Foundation atthelizlogelinfoundation.org or can be sent to P.O. Box 26366, St. Louis Park, MN 55426. Those who donate $75 or more will receive an official Nutty Putty Bike Trip t-shirt. The cyclers ask all those who are able, to contribute to this worthy cause.

To view the cyclists travel schedule, and learn more about the cause, visit nuttyputtycyclers.com. If you or someone you know is able to contribute to the Liz Logelin Foundation, or provide support to the traveling cyclers, please do so. If you find this to be a worthy cause, please copy and past this post in your own personal blog. We can all do something to make a difference.

Thank you,

Jacob S Paulsen

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In every possible way Albus Dumbledore from the Harry Potter stories, is the epitome of a great leader. There is of course the first are foremost organization of Hogwarts school that he leads forward with great leadership but much more importantly he is the leader of the greater fight against evil. There are a long list of things that make Dumbledore a great leader. Among them are some of the manager qualities of organization, reporting, and communication. However management never was leadership and Corporations who don’t understand that fail. What we are trying to establish here is the fact that Dumbledore was a great leader and establish what key traits made him such.

In trying to establish his leadership I suggest we look at the results that come from Albus Dumbledore’s leadership in the Harry Potter books. People of course love him and trust him, and his enemies fear him. His school runs smoothly despite his occasional absence or eccentric staff appointments and decisions. He also seems to have a habit of creating other effective leaders all around him. It would seem that he is somehow connected to every important and significant witch or wizard in the country. He is even the Chief Warlock of the Wizengamot, member of the International Confederation of Wizards, and founder and leader of The Order of the Phoenix but take note that he turned down the position of Minister of Magic. He works only in roles that give him an advantage in his goals. To further argue that he is a great leader I would point out that even though he does make mistakes (and he admits it), his goals are accomplished in the end. The reign of Voldemort comes to an end and that age of evil falls. Harry lives.

Accepting that he is indeed a great leader let us consider what are his greatest traits at the source of that fine leadership. Some of the more immediate answers might include that he knows his own strengths and utilizes them well. Perhaps the fact that he has an eye for great talent and knows how to effectively deploy people to the greatest advantage of the group and the individuals. He also adapts well to change and tends to foresee what’s coming. While these are all qualities of a great leader, and certainly qualities that Dumbledore possess, they are not the core qualities that define him as a leader.

Consider how his world revolves around two overlying values, trust and love. Dumbledore is a man who cares about the truth and has a strange tendency to trust people. Despite this people trust him so much that as Hermoine points out, “Dumbledore trusts him and if we can’t trust Dumbledore who can we trust?” People trust him for one simple reason. They know he sincerely cares about them. They trust that he has no hidden agenda or secondary motive. This trust comes from his ability to care or to be more frank, love. He loves people and sincerely wants what’s best for them. This isn’t a fake smile and a dance but a true feeling that comes from deep down. Consider anyone who you think of as a great leader and you will agree that you trusted them and you were confident they had your best interests at heart.

Dumbledore is always trying to train more leaders and Harry Potter is our prime candidate. Dumbledore could have spent time teaching Harry Potter a variety of magic or techniques but he knows how to create a great leader. He focuses on principles and key among them are a quest for truth and the power of true love. Remember that as you interact with people around you. Do you truly care about those around you? We are no longer in a society where facades and hidden motives can stay hidden. People can sense sincerity and a lack of it. Follow both Dumbledore and Harry’s example as you strive to become a great leader.

Jacob S Paulsen

One of the biggest steps of personal development is self discovery. Self discovery includes the search for one’s own strengths, weaknesses, inspirations, motivations, and more. The better you understand yourself the greater chance you have at improving the core.

One of the things I have been doing recently to understand myself better is in searching my past to find the source of my own personality and character attributes. This is a long and difficult process.

For example, why do I run? When did I begin running and why did I continue for so long? My general ability and desire to run has to be rooted somewhere. Running around on playgrounds at recess couldn’t be the source since most children at that age did that. If I can discover this little thing about me I will be able to perhaps instill in my own children a habit of exercise.

So here it goes:

My first memory of doing any running outside of what any other kids would have done stems back to elementary school. After grade 3 I stopped packing a lunch every day and started going home for lunch. One of the best things of going home for lunch everyday was the potential for a longer recess. The faster I got home and got back, the more time I got to play before going back in. This was motivation enough for me to run home for lunch and then run back to school. Even at a run it took me 7 or 8 minutes maybe to get home. Come to think of it this would probably explain why I eat so fast too.

Next memory of extra running comes from my paper route: I delivered the Green River Star paper every Tuesday. Mostly I walked the route because of the heavy load of papers on my shoulders but toward the end I would finish at a run to get home faster.

Around 6th or 7th grade I also picked up a daily paper route for the Daily Rocket Miner. My dad would drive me to the delivery area and drop me off at the top of each street. I would take an armful of papers and run the street throwing papers back and forth meeting my Dad at the end of the street where he delivered the last few homes while waiting. This was good for 30 minutes of running 6 days a week for 6 years.

In Junior High I joined the track team and ran distance. Mostly this decision came from the desire to be in a sport but not having skill at anything else. I figured I could do this and there was the least amount of competition at the longer distances so I decided to compete in the mile and 1/2 mile.  This continued through the end of high school where I also was on the cross country team.

Its not just about running. Why are we the way we are. If we wish to improve ourselves we must first understand who we are, thus enabling us to measure improvement. Changes are most easily made when we can identify how habits were formed in the first place.

I suppose that I’m only normal if I find some of my very greatest inspiration in movies, literature, and art. Well maybe I’m a little more nuts than most because I consciously think about these things and the themes and lessons that are being taught. I suspect sometimes that I’m even finding hidden meanings where the writers had no intention of meaning anything.

I’m naturally drawn to the hero/epic tales. I like being reminded that human nature can overcome evil and become much more. Heroes come in many forms and stories teach us what heroes are really made of. Perhaps the inspiring concept is that I too can be heroic.

I love the stories. I love pondering the saga of Anakin Skywalker and how one man’s decisions can change the galaxy… twice. I love the story of a humble Harry Potter who’s love and pure determination destroyed forever the darkest wizard of all time. Or the story of Dumbledore who dedicated his entire life to bringing down Valdemort through Harry. I love the painting that sits on the wall in my bedroom, Singing Butler by Jack Vettriano. It depicts a husband and wife dancing in a rainstorm.

I suppose that more important than where one gets their inspiration, is that they get inspired at all. Inspiration is necessary to help us keep the vision when times are hard. Discipline is giving up momentary pleasures for long term joy. When life gets difficult where do you go for a boost? How do you remind yourself of the greater ideals and values in life?

I for one think we can all be heroes and we all need our inspiration. Please share with us. Leave a comment below to share with the group where you find your inspiration.

I was recently interviewed about my experience as an entrepreneur. In the course of the 60 minute interview a very powerful phrase came out of my mouth and I’ve been reflecting on it ever since. I said, “Its not actually about who you know in life, but instead about who you are in life that matters.”

We commonly accept in life that people gain jobs and opportunities based on their personal connections. I think its a reality that can’t be ignored. I think however that the more important question is how those relationships came to be. It isn’t the simple introduction of someone else that gives us a useful “connection.” Your relationship with another is only a valuable asset if they are willing to help you. If anyone is willing to help you and do you a favor we have to assume that you must provide some form of value to them.

Relationships are based on an exchange of value. Sometimes that exchange can be monetary but those types of relationships don’t last. I’m talking about relationships that are built on an exchange of trust and love. These relationships of value give us a greater position in our society because we are an asset to others and they believe in us. So its true that in this life the people you know can make all the difference.

However, the only reason we “know” those people or gain anything from knowing them is because of the relationship we built with them. That is what I mean when I say that its not actually about who you know in life, but instead about who you are in life that matters. Who you are determines the relationships that you have and therefore who you are is the source of who you know.

I had a recent reality check that came from an unlikely source; my cell phone. The Android smartphone platform has a unique feature. As part of the dialer application there is a favorites list. This favorites list is not a user generated speed dial but instead a list of the contacts you actually talk to the most. Yep, its a quick look at reality and my list is a little scary. I’m happy to report that my wife is currently leading the list in the top spot. Sadly however I have two work associates in the top 4 and my parents are at the bottom of the top 20.

If your phone gave you a list of your “legitimate” favorites what would you see? Would you be happy with the way your loved ones line up?

Go Android

Jacob S Paulsen